I Don't Care What Other People Think! I am rattled by YOLO..

Students at the high school I work at had their last day of classes today.  A couple weeks of exams and we're off for another summer.  Graduates are obviously never back again.  Grad was a strangely awesome and also anticlimactic event.  I remember that first summer after I graduated as nothing really different than normal in my mind.  It really was weird moving to Lethbridge, and starting university, that's when I really realized things were different.  Meeting new people and all that.  Man I loved university.  I loved high school too.

Once I went to university I met a lot of different people. Some of whom did not have the same thoughts as I had.  Profs and people who challenged a whole lot of my thinking. I remember through the years really having to work out what I was about. (Still am obviously, that's what this whole blog thing is about)  A lot of us I'm sure have noticed a quote here and there like the one I have a the top of this post.  Here's another couple of them...

It seems like I have seen and heard many posts lately about how the most important thing is to not care about what other people think of you.  These quotes that are framed in artzy or cool graphic design format.  Basically they look pretty cool, or whimsical or something like that and they scream, "Listen to me!  I am a cool quote, that is well put together and I have an author's name that is familiar to most people.  This author's name is mainstream enough for people to know/think that the person is wise, even though most people have no clue what most of that author's work is about, yet, from your desire to want to be cultured, you will think, well that guy was a philosopher or great writer or something, therefore you must agree with his quote.  That is, if you want to believe yourself an enlightened person, and not some sheltered, conservative, stick in the mud.  You want to be cool with society right?  With the world right?"  That's what runs through my head when I read these great quotes sometimes.

You might think, "Wow, Jared is over thinking things again."  or "Jared, the quote has no hidden background agenda to make you feel like you aren't wise enough, they are just great quotes."  I agree with you who think those things most of the time, but when I see a theme like this multiple times I start to wonder about the validity of such things.

YOLO, (You Only Live Once, which I discovered a short while ago during my foray into Twitter) is a phrase that people put on twitter usually after they post something ridiculous that they did.  Sometimes it justifies an action.

Here is a Washington Post article about it if you want to read more about the phrase if you are as out of it as I was...  (Washington Post)

Anyway, the YOLO thing, the quotes, they sort of annoy me now.  The interesting thing to me is that the whole idea of telling people not to care what other people think actually completely contradicts the "Don't care what other people think" message.  It is inherent in the statement that I should not actually care what any of these quotes say because I don't need to care about what other people think about how my life should run.  "Jared!" you say, "The real message is NOT just about not caring at all what others think!"  Look, I get the main idea. I get it. What they (quotes, YOLO) are trying to say is, "Don't let people make you feel bad about yourself!  LIVE.  If people don't get you, that's o.k., you only need to be yourself." (I don't know if I can quote what quotes are saying, I'm pretty sure that isn't proper English and Greg Wolcott (teacher at our school who is gold) would kill me, but there it is.)
 
Great! That is truly a great message.  The problem is, when you truly get down to brass tacks (old school phrase for, "when you get right down to it") it is really is hard to define where society sets the "acceptable" standard for when you don't care what others think.  It is now a time where everything is o.k. for everyone because, "I feel good about it." 

In my opinion, I guess I think you really SHOULD care what other people think sometimes.  WHEN, is a bit of a debate, but you can't just get away with YOLOing your life away just because YOLO.  That's just stupid.  I need to care about what others think or I just become a jerk. (some of you may think that already, I sure hope not!)

My father-in-law is doing this Body by Vi challenge, and I am going to start it too because I have been a hypocrite with my first blog post about losing 50lbs.  I am ashamed to admit it, and fear that my other posts have no validity because I have been SUCH a hypocrite about it.  I have been working out pretty regularly but my diet gets away on me.  If I am honest, I am just selfish really.  I want something therefore I eat it.  YOLO.  FRICK.  I don't care what anyone else thinks, but where has that gotten me.  To Fatville.  It's a nice town, but I always feel like leaving that town.  It's like people that have always wanted to leave home and do something else but never got up the gumption (that's right, I used gumption) to get out of their job they don't like, take a risk and blow this joint.  Fatville is familiar to me and I am selfish because I act like I care about what is good for my kids and family, but can't win in that area of my life because I don't care what anyone else thinks.  Seriously, if Krista saw me in the shape I am in, she would not be impressed.  She would not be mad at me per se, she would be disappointed because she knew I could do better. I can do better.  So instead of YOLOing next time I see a pizza I am going to try and remember that I can't use YOLO as an excuse to just eat what I want.  I need to use it as an excuse to make myself the best I can in this one life.  "Why wouldn't you fight for the greatest achievement ever?" - Ray Lewis (watch the video here)

I guess what I am trying to say tonight is this.  I DO need to care what others think much of the time.  I also need to NOT care what others think some of the time.  Those two parts live in a strange balance that is different for all of us.  Live solely based on what other people think and you become a follower that never truly knows yourself.  Life solely for yourself and you will be a jerk that pushes people away as soon as they require work from you.  Where do you live in that mix?  Where do I live?  I need to think about that...

(PS - I am going to punch myself 9 times for the number of times I put in YOLO because I hate it so much.  Oops, that last one made it 10.  Dang it!)